Comedy news: Greenwich Comedy Festival: Mark Watson's big night out

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It’s not often you go to a comedy gig expecting a near riot, but with Hans Teeuwen on the bill of the last night of the inaugural Greenwich Comedy Festival it was a distinct possibility. 

The Dutch absurdist’s set was always going to be a tipping point, he has the ability to leave an audience rolling around in uncontrollable mirth or baying for blood – such is his ability to split a crowd. 

And yet, things had started out so serenely at headliner Mark Watson’s Big Night Out, with compare Jo Brand competently pepping up the crowd with her usual mix of gender politics, self-depreciation and sarcasm drawing laughs throughout.

Opening preceedings was the delightfully dark Sarah Millican who managed to shock, titillate and be completely lovely simultaneously. It is incredible to think that she’d never been in a comedy club before her debut on the stand-up circuit in 2005, she has a completely natural stage presence it is surprising she wasn’t born there.

Her ability to turn the mundane (a couple shopping at a supermarket) into absolute filth (unlubed sex with a cucumber) makes Millican a true gem in a largely barren field of British female comics and highlights why she won best newcomer at Edinburgh last year.

But even as blue as she had turned the air, no-one was quite prepared for Teeuwen, as he hit the stage like the nonsensical European cousin of Tom Waits. Soon he was launching into random MJ/Nina Simone-inspired medleys, bizarre bodily contortions and a perverted hand puppet routine where righty screws lefty. 

The crowd were suitably puzzled and half (me included) absolutely loved it. 

But the other half certainly didn’t. Some began leaving halfway through a clever rant against religion and by the end of his ode to the vagina (‘I Like Your C***’) others were screaming for him to get off stage. It was brilliant, stand-up theatre at its most divisive and Teeuwen positively basked in it as he rolled around on floor with a fold-out chair.

Eventually, several minutes after the booing started, he was gone. But the damage done with the crowd split right down the middle.

By the time Mark Watson took to the stage to headline, some of those who walked out had returned safe in the knowledge Teeuwen had left – the audience atmosphere was restless and disconnected, and the set was always likely to be an anti-climax.

Watson is a safe performer, and maybe his musings over his forthcoming fatherhood and chasing as a socially acceptable adult pursuit helped relieve the tense crowd. But the memory of the Dutchman was fresh in the collective mind and it was detrimental to the Bristolian’s set.

At times, Watson’s natural awkwardness also worked against him - he has recently been irked by criticism of his participation in the Magner's Pear Cider commercials and felt the need to defend himself onstage, which was fine but you could see that with that and Teeuwen added together, was enough to be distracting. And when he realised he was running late for a long-haul flight, he was gone quicker than a flash.

Overall the final night of Greenwich Comedy Festival was an enjoyable two hours interrupted or accentuated - depending on your comedy standpoint - by an insane Dutchman with penchant for confrontational stand-up.

The Greenwich Comedy Festival is over until next year but if you have the chance, go and see Teeuwen when he returns to the UK in November.

You have not seen anything like it before. I promise.

Jesse Whittock