Such Small Portions is a website all about comedy. We've been plugging away since 2007, covering The Laughs from Vancouver, Austria and New Zealand. To be honest, though, we're normally just in the United Kingdom.
We do news (and daily news round-ups of all the stuff you can't be bothered to read in full), and we do features, with prolific interviews, live comedy recommendations and reviews. We also do live events, from a comedy cook-off competition at Dave's Leicester Comedy Festival, to another big project that might be happening later this year. Then again, it might not. Let's wait and see, eh?
In particular, we're suckers for writing about the comedy industry, and the rapidly growing comedy festival scene. There's also a whole generation of new comedians that don't seem to get tremendously well covered at the moment. We're doing our best to remedy that situation.
Why read us? Well, for a sector based on The Funny, we're perpetually amazed at how serious everyone is. Sometimes all you want to do is make comedians get into fights over cookery, poke a drunk Doug Stanhope with a metaphorical stick, or get Emma Kennedy to get into a long-winded anecdote about the sex drive of dwarves.
(That got us on to page nine of Google for 'dwarf sex'. We're working on getting higher.)
A history lesson
Such Small Portions came into existence after eleven journalism students were locked in a room at City University in February 2007 until they came up with an idea for an online magazine.
The final two choices were comedy and hairdressing. If you've seen the SSP editors' hair, you'll understand why you're now reading a comedy site.
Like most websites we've gone through various incarnations, but can always be spotted by our lovely airship logo. Why we have an airship seems to have been lost to the mists of time, but it's about the only thing that hasn't changed over the years, and it's good to maintain the traditions, like fox hunting, or forced marriages.
What's with the name?
Such Small Portions is based on the opening sketch of Woody Allen’s Annie Hall, about two old ladies in a cafe in the Catskill Mountains. The food is awful, they say, but even though they can't stand it, they still can't get enough of it.
With this joke Allen manages to sum up one of life's great ironies: that though we may complain and moan throughout the duration of our lives, the whole thing is over all too quickly.
With that mantra firmly placed within our heads, the main ethos of SSP is to delve into comedy as well as report on it, getting our hands dirty and turning up in unexpected places. Like Leicester.
Where else can I find SSP?
All the internet's hottest spots. Twitter. Facebook. We've probably got a Myspace login somewhere but we're quite good at losing these things.
Who the devil are you?
The site is now headed up by the last of the original team Tim Clark, and Johnny Latecomer Andrew Mickel. Bell us on Twitter, or firstname.lastname@example.org.
Well OBVIOUSLY you'll be wanting to advertise with us. Together with several of the internet's hottest comedy properties we form the Comedy Advertising Network, reaching 600,000 a month.
Find out more at the Comedy Ad Network.